The Rita Archives
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Who is the REAL Rita G
Well if you think you can handle it, I’ll give you a sneak peek into my REAL life…..
First I want to thank the many who have faithfully been checking and eagerly anticipating what I will write next. It’s been awhile because just like you I can get caught up and preoccupied with everyday personal drama and a hectic schedule…. Plus I refuse to write ‘filler’ or about subjects that don’t really move me, so I have to wait on that inspiration to bring you something REAL…. Most of the mail I get from fans and admirers is filled with questions wanting to know more detailed and personal information about what I am REAL-ly like in person. For example, my webmaster gets questions like:
What’s Rita really like?
Have you ever f’ed her?
Does she like to party?
Does she have a boyfriend? Kids?
You get the idea…. I would love to tell you all my dirty little secrets, but as my friend Jack Nicholson would say ‘YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!”….. or maybe you can, lets see..
People have asked ‘what’s the weirdest thing about you that no one would ever guess?’….hmmm, well I eat sour dill pickles with dry watermelon-cherry Kool-aid poured in the middle – my idea of a fun snack. When I bite into it – I make this face that looks like I just ate 10 lemons, but it hurts so good!! I thought everyone ate their pickles like that growing up, but I keep meeting people who’ve never heard of it and think it’s gross… just one of those ‘old school’ ‘ghetto’ snacks I guess… oh here’s another one – I actually eat food off the floor, all the time. one time I was in Walmart sucking on a cough drop and it fell out of my mouth and landed on a piece of rug in the fruit section. I picked it right up and when I didn’t see any dirt sticking to it I put it back in my mouth. Yep, I sure did. I do this all the time and I don’t care who’s watching. Hehehe. Then another time I spilled all my skittles on the ground as I was getting in my car. I picked up every last one of them (even ones I stepped on) and put them back in the bag and ate ALL of them. WAIT! Why am I not embarrassed by this? What’s wrong with me? I think I actually feel a strange sense of pride in the fact that I ain't no super prissy/dainty/girly type-a-chick scared to break a nail and all that. I’ll catch frogs or dissect/kill bugs etc. I think I just have this devilish adventurous streak that makes me want to meet the challenge of any ‘dare’. I love doing shit in public that makes people look at each other and say ‘I know she didn’t just do that!’ One of my few ‘girly’ traits is that I am a shoe freak. But that’s okay, it just lets me know I’m a woman. I love collecting rare, retro or just cool sneakers. Size 7.5 girls or 6 boys – for those fans who don’t know what to get me on my birthday Feb 5th… (hint). Also, here’s another one…… at one time I was conducting my own little ‘case study’ in the area of shoplifting (I cant believe I am telling you this). Cuz I think it’s amazing what you can get away with when you don’t look the type, don’t you? So I had a friend of mine who is a big bald headed Muslim brotha’ go into a store with me and I made him steal an itsy bitsy teeny weenie silver colored paper box that was only 99 cents and I put on a very expensive pair of sunglasses on my head. Needless to say my friend didn’t get the silver box cuz he was being followed by this police and so nervous he kept dropping it. Meanwhile, when the alarm sounded as I passed the little security thing by the door – nobody came. As incredulous as it may sound they just waved me out and said ‘Oh, go ahead – it’s not you’. Is that some funny shit or what?! As you can see I definitely keep myself entertained – I love hanging out with myself. I am endlessly fascinated with my own company and never feel lonely or bored when I am not around other people.
Unlike many girls who do what I do I don’t need or crave the attention or adoration of the masses in order to reassure me that I am indeed special, sexy, beautiful or worthy of being loved etc.. I find many girls doing this are seeking some sort of validation. It seems that most have endured childhood experiences or unhealthy relationship experiences that have damaged their self esteem to the point that they have a constantly need (with a capitol N) for others to acknowledge their beauty or special-ness before they think they deserve to feel beautiful or special etc.. don’t mean to preach, I guess I’ll step off my pulpit…
Okay lets get to the juicy stuff, SEX SEX SEX… do I have a boyfriend/husband/kids? No, no, and no….. BUT, I do have a girlfriend (sorry – don’t hate me). c’mon I know your not surprised. For the record I have dated men before and I very much enjoy and appreciate men and the different energy they bring…. As humans we are creatures of habit, and that means we are comfortable with what we KNOW and what is familiar. While I have experimented with men, I have dated women for most of my sexually active adult life. And because that’s where I have the most experience, that’s where I’m most comfortable because that’s what I know – pretty simple. I’m definitely NOT a man-hater and have my best relationships with men since the awkwardness created by sexual tension never becomes an issue.
More interesting info about my REAL life? it may surprise you to know that throughout my entire life my intellect, wit, and other abilities has always overshadowed my looks. From the time I started school I only remember getting constant praise for my academic excellence and other achievements – my folks practically thought I was a ‘baby genius’ or something, taking advanced college courses as early as 7th grade memorizing dictionaries, books etc. I only tell you this because I find people make so many crazy assumptions about me and what my life must be like just because I’m this cute ‘sexy’ chick you see in the pictures. They think I was probably a cheerleader or prom queen whose led this ‘pretty girl’ life with a line of guys just waiting to shower me with expensive gifts and do anything I want because they want to sleep with me so bad…. Basically people assume that I have always been a hot chick and probably learned very early how to use what I have (physical looks) to get what I want. NOT! I never quite perfected the art of manipulating men for money or favors because I never had to but also because I feel more secure relying on my own wit and resourcefulness than on men’s emotions.
Another REAL life fact about me, I don’t ‘celebrate’ Christmas or any other holiday – and it’s not cuz I’m Jewish. It’s because I am an independent thinker. I don’t accept anyone basically telling me I should do a certain thing, on a certain day, for a certain reason. That’s like telling me how to think, but since I have my own mind. I decide what’s special to me. I decide what has meaning to me, I decide IF, when or how I choose to acknowledge or ‘celebrate’ those things. Just because the whole rest of the world is doing a certain thing, a certain way – it’s not a good enough reason for me to do it that way. I don’t let TV or media tell me what is beautiful or sexy – I decide for myself what is beautiful and sexy to me. I have to reach my own conclusions based on my own evaluation of fact, research and other data. Call me scientific, clinical or whatever you want – that’s just me.
Okay, back to more ‘juicy’ stuff… SEX SEX SEX! Lol…. If you read my archived columns on the left side of this page (titled – Dirty Words) you know I love lesbian erotic poetry. Let me share this one by PoeticMuzic called YOU GOT ME HOT!
You got me hot / come put my fire out / with the wetness of your tongue / make me scream out your name / while the flames continue to run / this isn’t a temporary request / let me lick you from your toes to your honey brown breasts / I know you wont protest / when my head’s between yo thighs / I got that Vitamin H (head) to have you hypnotized / mesmerized, look into my eyes / tell me what you want from me / as I slide 1,2,3 fingers inside your Pussy / move real slow cuz you know I’m a tease / and if I stop stroking you / you’ll be on your knees / beggin me please / baby suck my clit, lick, and stick / and I wont forget to return the favor / I’ll savor every part of you / find out what you like to do / like 69in’ , rough ridin’ , out and in / contemplatin’ what we did and do it all over again / see when you walked in the room all quiet and shy my eyes were paralyzed / from your head to your thighs I don’t know why / but I couldn’t wait to get inside you / hear you moan while I groan / bump and grind with you / make your legs shake while you gyrate your hips towards my lips / I’m dabbin’ and dippin’ and taking sweet sips / I wont stop till you cum hard and fast / then I know I got that ass / on lock / Damn, you got me hot!
DAMN! Well, it’s been REAL…… I can definitely say that
Till next time
The G
Rita G. is one of the most popular
models in the world. Her appearances, and subsequent airings
on Howard Stern’s E! Network television show in late 2003,
were among the highest rated ever, causing them to be
repeated faster than any other Stern episodes up to that
time. Since then, she has appeared as a correspondent for
BET (Black Entertainment Television), appeared on radio with
Dr. Dre, and Hot 97 out of NYC, appeared in dozens of
magazines, including the cover of the nationally syndicated
Smooth Girl magazine. Rita has also been featured in
Playboy, and in December 2005 was named the new Sex/Advice
Columnist for Playboy's "Special Edition"
Magazine. She is featured on her website, www.rita-g.com.
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